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So, the other day, I went shopping and came home with an unexpected item: a (vegan) leather spiked vest. Yup. Me. The woman with three kids, approaching her 30’s…the woman who usually wears this:
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And this:
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That’s right-I’m a pearls, lace, and chiffon type of gal, and always have been. Since I can remember, I have  been drawn to the more ‘delicate’ fabrics, which coincidently resembles my personality. Just like the materials I wear, I’m known as the one with the ‘soft’ voice, the one that is ‘gentle’ with my words when in conversation; in other words I’m known as the ‘delicate’ one. So then why did I buy this leather vest that is completely not ‘me’? What was I thinking? Am I going through a mid-life crisis where I have lost my identity?….

….To answer my own questions, I have to say that I don’t know? You see, my first reaction when I saw this vest on the hanger at the store, was that it was ‘cool’….then I saw the spikes on the shoulders and hesitated to even try on the vest. Was this too ‘biker chic’ for a mom of three whom  usually dresses herself in chiffon and lace? Then, a voice inside my head convinced me to try the vest on…hmmm…this doesn’t look bad at all! Perhaps I can ‘pull it off’…or can I? Sigh…the dilemma! With a slight doubt, I decided to purchase the vest!

During the car ride home, I started visually pairing the ‘feminine’ pieces of clothing in my closet with the vest, and this provided me with greater confidence with my purchase. I was starting to convince myself that I made a good buy!

Now, back to my question: Am I going through a MID-LIFE CRISIS? Well, if stepping out of my comfort zone when it comes to clothing is the definition of a mid-life crisis, then YES! But if purchasing this vest means that I’m finally willing to try new looks, new fabrics, and new styles, then NO! I have to say that this year has been a year of great changes for me: I’ve become bolder in my decisions, I have been daring with my approach in life, I have been spending more time on getting to know myself and my passions. Maybe this isn’t a mid-life crisis, but just ‘me’ finally coming to be known! A few years ago, I would have been afraid to pursue my dreams, I didn’t believe in myself. Looking back, I realize I was working for others and not working on myself, I was fitting the mold of another person, and suppressing my personality.

Unfortunately, my biggest concern was pleasing others…however, today I know that it’s important to put myself first. I might be judged for dressing a certain way- in fact I know that I’am…but I can confidently say that it doesn’t bother me anymore as much as it did a year ago. I still dress modestly, as that’s very important to me and my identity as a Muslimah, but I feel you can still dress modestly and celebrate your personality through your clothing!

Modest ways you can wear this vest:

With a black abaya, gold bangles, and black heels
With a black abaya, gold bangles, and black heels
With a maxi skirt in any color, and either a shirt in the same colour as the maxi skirt, or a black shirt. Maxi Skirt- Forever 21 Necklace- Suzy Shier
With a maxi skirt in any color, and either a shirt in the same colour as the maxi skirt, or a black shirt.
Maxi Skirt- Forever 21
Necklace- Suzy Shier
With a printed hijab and handchain. Hijab- Modern Hejab Handchain- Lu'Lu' Bag
With a long sleeve maxi dress, printed hijab and handchain.
Hijab- Modern Hejab
Handchain- Lu’Lu’ Bag

See! I can still wear my ‘feminine’ clothing with this vest and maintain who I am, but add a bit of boldness that I don’t often show..but am starting to show more of! With all of this said, my advice for anyone is to try things on before judging a piece of clothing, don’t be afraid to mix different styles, textures, prints, and fabrics together; and JUST BE YOU!

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10 comments on “My Mid-Life Crisis?”

  1. Beautiful masha’Allah. At first, when I saw your post my face did this 0.O…Then I read and saw the way you wore it and my face went to delight mode :). You wore it conservatively and very nicely masha’Allah. Keep doing you! Houb salam! ^_^

    • Lol sis! I think I made it work with the pieces I already have in my closet 🙂 Of course, I would never even consider purchasing something like this, but for some reason I was totally drawn to it!
      Jazaki Allahu Khair for your kind words sis xoxo

  2. I love it! I have a similar vest, only it has pearls and a good chain instead of studs.. I think, you would love it * ♥ .. I think the way you paired it up is totally perfect, who says you can’t be a (modest) mummy but not look good?

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